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If you’ve ever been a bridesmaid or a groomsman, you know that it’s a sizeable investment of time, money, and general bandwidth. From bridesmaid dresses to bachelor parties in Vegas to emotional support of the big day, your wedding party is going to be doing a whole lot for you. Of course, most of these special people are going to be more than happy to help you out, but it’s nice to invite them to be a part of your wedding with a small token of pre-appreciation. But what are the very best ways to ask your bridesmaids and groomsmen to join the inner circle that is your wedding party?

Treat your wedding party proposals like you or your partner treated the engagement proposal: make it personal and valuable. It doesn’t need to be as expensive as an engagement ring, but ideally it has value in that it is actually useful. This usually resembles a note and a small present, but as with wedding favors, the best “Will you be in my wedding party?”-gifts are things that your dear friends will actually use. Potpourri with their name on it? Probably not the most useful, especially now that the ‘90s are over. A mini Diptyque candle? Now we’re talking. Here are some sweet ideas for you to consider.

1. Small Toiletry Bags
Custom toiletry or makeup bags are both useful on the big day, and generally helpful for travel. Plus, they’re extremely adorable. Etsy is full of sweet monogrammed pouches for you to check out.

2. A Luggage Tag
Most people travel regularly, but most people do not label their luggage properly. Custom luggage tags are a perfect way invite your bridesmaids or groomsmen to come along for the ride.

3. A Customized Cooler Can
Koozies are wedding favors, but ordering custom Yeti cups for the members of your wedding party is an extremely classy way to invite them to join in the fun. (And imbibe while they’re at it!)

4. A Bottle Of Champagne
Simple, but classic. No one will be upset at a delivery of nice bubbly with a handwritten note attached.

5. A Rose
You can riff on The Bachelorette franchise’s “Will you accept this rose?” in you note and deliver a rose to each member of the wedding party. Better yet, make it a little bottle of pink drink that reads, “Will you accept this rosé?”

6. Host An Event
Another oldie, but definite goodie — invite your special friends to a dinner or night out for special cocktails, and “propose” to them all at once. Then, of course, pick up the tab!

7. A Portable Charger
Weddings suck the life out of people, and they also suck the life out of iPhone batteries. Save the day by ordering aesthetically appealing portable chargers for your wedding crew when you ask if they’ll join your big day. Portable chargers are the kind of thing that’s very useful, but no one ever buys for themselves.

Written By: Kimmy Foskett