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I was in Las Vegas a month ago to relive my teenage years at the Backstreet Boys’ live show. (They crushed it, obviously.) At the show, a group of about 12 very sauced women wearing “Bride Tribe” shirts had to be escorted out of the theater when one friend let her inebriation show a little too much. And this was after just one song. What a bummer. No shade to anyone who lives for debauchery in Vegas, but I’m more of a subtle celebration kind of girl. At the risk of sounding snotty, I simply prefer a classy bachelorette party to a rowdy one.

There are plenty of ways to celebrate the bride-to-be without exceeding three tequila shots or hiring male strippers (unless that’s really her thing). Were I to get engaged, I would be more interested in a chill weekend getaway than an episode of Jersey Shore for my bachelorette party. It all comes down to picking the right environment and the right decor.

Skip The Sashes And Crowns

Some of my very dearest, classiest friends have insisted on wearing “bride to be” sashes to nice dinners in Manhattan, and that’s totally OK. I just personally freak out when a friend even suggests she might tell a waiter it’s my birthday, and prefer not to have too much attention on me in public. One way to switch up the vibe of a bach is to ban all of the crowns, sashes, glow sticks, wands, and whatever other favors might be sitting in the bridal section of Party City.

Choose A Chill Airbnb

In my dreams, I would plan my bachelorette somewhere like Palm Springs or Santa Barbara. Chill beach vibes, BBQs, and drinking at a bomb Airbnb all sound great to me. Another option would be to plan a getaway to a rural cabin or even to someplace with an activity, like hiking or skiing. This way at least you can balance your pre-wedding drinking with some fresh air.

Have A Staycation Bach’

I’ve always dreamed about renting out a suite at a hotel with a rooftop and inviting all of my friends nearby over for a sweet staycation. I think I may actually do this if I ever have a bachelorette. There’s something fun about balling out at a hotel without having to travel far. I know that my friends would appreciate a bachelorette that required no train or plane travel, too.

Choose Your Decor Wisely

Straws shaped like male genitalia are fun, but they honestly make me a little uncomfortable. I also would feel weirdly queen adjacent if all of my friends were wearing matching bathing suits that they bought just for my bachelorette. While getting married is cool, as a woman in 2018, I sometimes feel a little bit strange about how much we celebrate “finally finding someone.” I’d stick to Tiki drinks in fun coconut cups with regular shaped straws (resusable, of course).

At the end of the day, it’s your party and you’ll do what you want to. And that’s good. This is just my take on some ideas for a more relaxed bachelorette, for anyone else out there who’s a little uncomfortable with the whole thing. Party on!

Written by: Kimmy Foskett